Untitled Masterpiece About The Ghosts In The Guest Bedroom (8.4.14)

Prompt: Make a list of totems from your childhood. Think back and try and remember the things that scared you the most, were the most mysterious, kept you at night. Use the items as a jumping off point.

#4 UNTITLED MASTERPIECE ABOUT THE GHOSTS IN THE GUEST BEDROOM

(Lights rise on two ghosts, MARTHA and GEORGE. They are completely transparent, and their faces are not completely recognizable. They speak in Trans-Atlantic accents.They suspended several feet in the air. If they are to be played by physical beings, the string attached to their bodies should be very obvious. They are dressed in period clothing from the 50's. They are in a pool of blue light in a small, sea foam green guest bedroom, with walls several feet tall. There are two closets on opposite sides of the room, one wooden door leading to the hallway, and a large bed with fluffy white sheets on a raised platform center)

MARTHA: George. George.

(George stirrs)

MARTHA: We're out. We're REALLY out!

GEORGE: (drowsily) Hmm?

MARTHA: It seems we've…been kicked out of purgatory! Look! We're in a ROOM! A real room!

GEORGE: It is nice to see another color besides white.

(A laugh track)

MARTHA: Wait…oh George. Will you look around! Really LOOK around!

GEORGE: What? (a silence) Wait…

(Martha squeals. She flies around rapidly)

GEORGE: Be quiet, Martha!

MARTHA: Wee!

(A laugh track)

MARTHA: Oh George! Do you think we'll be able to make it in here like we used to?

GEORGE: Martha! We haven't been able to make anything in years because we're ectoplasm.

(A laugh track)

MARTHA: This is amazing. Really.

(Enter a LITTLE BOY. A light shines in from the hallway)

LITTLE BOY: Hello?

MARTHA: Look, George! It's a human!

(Laugh track)

LITTLE BOY: Whose there?

MARTHA: Quick! Hide!

(They dash under the bed)

LITTLE BOY: Whose there. I know someone's there.

MARTHA: Shoot, George. He's on to us.

LITTLE BOY: Are you ghosts.

GEORGE: (with heavy vibrato) This is our room! This is our room!

LITTLE BOY: No it's not. It's my parents now.

GEORGE: (with heavy vibrato) Your parents are dead!

MARTHA: (whispering) George. Don't terrorize the boy.

GEORGE: (whispering) Isn't that sort of the point of haunting if you're a ghost?

MARTHA: (whispering) Oh.

(Laugh track)

LITTLE BOY: My parents are dead?

GEORGE: (with heavy vibrato) No. But we are! And we're angry!

LITTLE BOY: (calling, scared) Mom? Dad?

(He runs out. They rise above the bed)

MARTHA: Ah shoot! Now the adults will see us with 

GEORGE: Aren't ghosts invisible to ignorant adults?

MARTHA: I think so.

(Laugh track)

GEORGE: Oh, Martha. It sure is good to be home.

MARTHA: I just hope we can have some alone time.

GEORGE: I mean, we do have a bed don't we!

(He tries to put his hand on the bed. It goes through it)

GEORGE: Rats! We're ectoplasm!

(Laugh track)

(Enter MOM and DAD with Little Boy. The hallway light bleeds through as they enter. They are several feet tall)

MOM: Honey, I don't see anything here.

(Dad shines a flashlight)

DAD: See? This is my LED flashlight. I don't see anything.

MOM: I think he's been watching too much Ghostbusters.

DAD: And Casper The Friendly Ghost.

MOM: Christ, our son is morbid!

(Laugh track) 

LITTLE  BOY: Are you sure? I swear I heard them moving.

MOM: Cmon tiger. Let's go to bed.

(They all exit. The door closes)

MARTHA: Is this what it's gonna be like forever now?

(Sudden blackout. Applause)